How To Turn Life Challenges Into Opportunities

I was speaking with my friend the other day and we got to talking about a transition that many people go through. It is that of having a son/daughter in law. When that happens you automatically become the mother-in-law. Why is this labeled a transition? The relationship that you experience with the in-law can be difficult sometimes. It is a role that is hard to play. Sometimes you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t. They have totally different personalities and you have to learn it. You also didn’t grow up with this person and you may or may not like them. It doesn’t really matter because it is who your child has chosen to be his/her spouse. The key is to tread lightly. You don’t want to alienate your child but at the same time, you don’t want your rights to be violated either. It can get pretty tricky. It usually lies with the parent to do the adjusting not the in-law. THey are going to be who they are going to be. Your child is with this person now, good or bad, and it is hard to accept sometimes. You certainly can’t expect your child to take sides, if you do YOU WILL ALWAYS LOSE. Don’t put yourself inthat situation. The question is do you want your child in your life at any means or not. We need to question our own self and decide. How important is it to you. If you want your child in your life, you may have to make some consessions in your relationship with thier spouse, such as, serve what they like to eat, follow their rules that they ask you too, even if you don’t agree with them. It is hard to merge your family values with the in-laws sometimes and that is where you need to make a decision. Either you become assertive and stand up for what you believe or you don’t. My opinion is you need to pick your battles. Decide what you can live with and what you can’t. This in-law will be in your life as long as they are married to your child. They may produce grandchildren that you may want to be involved with. You may have had one relationship with your child before the spouse entered their life and that will very well change. You need to prepare for this. If you as the parent don’t have your own values, thoughts etc. together, it will make the transition all that much harder. Additonally, you will have the spouses family in your life. This is another relationship that needs to be nutured. The bottom line is this: How important is the relationship with your child? Do you want the relationship at any cost, or do you have limits? Will you accept your childs new spouse, or just tolerate them. It can be a very difficult time in your life, or not, but one that is definately a transition worth thinking about.

From WE to Me Transition Program was originally developed for widows to learn how to live from a couple to a single. Now it has been redesigned to apply to any transition that you are going through. It is 12 steps that once you learn them, you will be able to apply them to any life challenge that you may be going through now or in the future. We can go through any life challenge alone, but why do that when the purpose of life is to let you live happy and free and the From WE to Me program can get you to that point quicker and easier. When we are going through our lifes challenes, we think that we will never get through it and it will never end. But with the From We to Me transition program, you don’t have to feel that way any longer. We all will face challenges, weather we choose them or they choose us. We only go around on this earth one time, so we need to make it count. I know I have personally suffered through 2 very tramatic challenges, but since I adopted this program, I have come through them quicker and easier than I thought I would. Yes, it still hurts, and we need to give our selves permission to feel the pain, and hurt and anger, but we also need to give our selves persmission to move forward and begin to live “life after the challenge”. Life after a challenge will be different, but it doesn’t have to be harder. Change your thoughts, change your life. From We to Me teaches you how to perceive your transition in a different light, to find the positive in the worst and use that to gain strength, and fortitude, to keep going. You can have a richer life and be able to move forward, once you learn what you need to do.
It is so hard to go through challenges, ( I know some, divorce, death, unemployment, you think you will never get through) but you do, only to be wiser, smarter as a result.

What is a transition? Most people think it means change. It does, but it applies to how you pereive your change. Change is the actual event, trama, thing etc. that is happening to you. It is usually something you can’t change, and often it is a choice that was made for you not by you.
The transiton piece applies to how you see the event in your life. You have two choices, you can look at it as an adversity, (negative) or you can look at it as an opportunity (positive). To move forward in your life, to get past the “event” you have to look at the opportunity it presents. Sometimes changes are “boots in our but” to change something that we need to change, but either don’t want to or don’t know how. Yes, we need to grieve the loss that the event presents, and take the time to do that, but you can’t take to long. The key is to find the balance between grief and moving forward. You have to grieve so you can come to acceptance (the last step in the grief process) because until you do, you can’t move past it. The trick is to find a balance. I tell people take 1 day, 1 week, 1 month etc. (depending on the event) and then stop. You then need to take back your life, DON’T LET THE EVENT DEFINE YOU, and begin the process of change. Change can be a good thing, sometimes it means a new beginning, an adventure, a new opportunity and it can be exciting if you pereive it that way.
So the next time you face a life challenge, don’t let it defeat you. You are stonger than that.